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My brain seems to be dead these days.

As in, it doesn’t want to think.  Or consider.  Or analyze.  Or process.

It feels like it’s dead.  I do things by remote control.  I get up in the morning.  I feed the dog.  I put water on for coffee.  I go to the bathroom.  I let the dog out to do her thing.  I pour the water into the French press.  I drink it.

By the time I’ve been up out of bed for 2 hours, I’m bored.  Or rather my brain is.  There’s nothing left to do, no place left to go.  I am brain-dead.

Not brain-dead in the same way as my little brother was for 3 days after over-dosing on alcohol, cocaine and heroin.  He was never going to recover from that situation.  I’m simply brain-dead in that my brain doesn’t want to work.

Is it because I am doing stuff I don’t want to do?  With money that I don’t have?  With people I don’t want to do it with?  Possibly.  And why is that?  What is it that’s keeping me here?  Doing things I don’t want to do with people I don’t want to do it with?  What the hell?

Yes.  What the hell…..

The brain is catching on….maybe
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